Dealing with Angry or Difficult Customers

It's important to handle difficult or unhappy customers professionally. Learning how to stay calm under pressure can help you get through challenging situations with grace and professionalism.

Change your tone of voice - If your customer is especially angry, then talk slowly and calmly. This will help lower the tension and ensure that you don't escalate the situation by getting stressed or upset.

Offer to meet in person - If your client has sent you a difficult email or they're angry with you over the phone, offer to meet with them in person. This will not only diffuse anger, but it also shows that you genuinely want to address and fix the situation.

7 Steps to help with these conversations:

Step One: Adjust Your Mindset – Don’t take it personally

Once you're aware that your client is unhappy, your priority is to put yourself into a customer service mindset. This means that you set aside any feelings you might have that the situation isn't your fault, or that your client has made a mistake, or that they are giving you unfair criticism. All that matters is that you realize that your customer is upset, and that it's up to you to solve the problem. Give them 100 percent of your focus.

Step Two: Listen Actively

The most important step in this process is listening actively to what your client or customer is saying – they want to be heard, and to air their grievances. Start the conversation with a neutral statement, such as, "Let's go over what happened," or "Please tell me why you're upset." This subtly creates a partnership between you and your client and lets them know that you're ready to listen. Resist the temptation to try to solve the situation right away, or to jump to conclusions about what happened. Instead, let your client tell their story. As they're talking, don't plan out what you're going to say when they're done – this isn't active listening! Also, don't allow anything to interrupt this conversation.

Occasionally a client or customer may become verbally abusive towards you or your team. Know in advance what you'll tolerate, and what you won't. If things escalate, you may need to be assertive and stand up for yourself, or even walk away from the situation to give the client time to cool down. If you feel that your client is being unreasonable, you might start to get upset, especially if they're criticizing you, or your organization, unfairly. So learn anger management skills so that you can stay calm in these situations.

Step Three: Repeat Their Concerns

Once they've had time to explain why they're upset, repeat their concerns so you're sure you are addressing the right issue. Use calm, objective wording. For example, "As I understand it you are upset because we didn't install the tile you chose." Repeating the problem shows the customer you were listening, and it helps you agree on the problem that needs to be solved.

Step Four: Be Empathic and Apologize gracefully

Once you're sure that you understand your client's concerns, be empathic. Show that you understand why they're upset and make sure your body language also communicates this understanding and empathy. For example, you could say, "I understand why you're upset. I would be too. I'm very sorry that the incorrect tile was installed."

Step Five: Present a Solution

If you feel you know what will make your customer happy, tell them how you'd like to correct the situation. You could say, "I will work with my tile supplier and your PB to ensure we are able to install the correct tile as quickly as possible."

If you're not sure you know what your client wants from you, or if they resist your proposed solution - ask them to identify what will make them happy. For example, you could say, "If my solution doesn't work for you, I'd love to hear what will make you happy. If it's in my power I'll get it done, and if it's not possible, we can work on another solution together."

Step Six: Take Action and Follow Up

Once you've both agreed on a solution, you need to take action immediately. Explain every step that you're going to take to fix the problem to your client If they contacted you by phone, make sure that they have your name and contact details. This gives them a feeling of control because they can get hold of you again if they need to. Once the situation has been resolved, follow up with your client over the next few days to make sure that they're happy with the resolution. Whenever you can, go above and beyond their expectations. For instance, you could send a gift certificate, give them a great discount on their next purchase, or send a hand-written apology.

Step Seven: Use the Feedback

Your last step is to reduce the risk of the challenge happening again. If you haven't already done so, identify how the problem started in the first place. Was there a bottleneck that slowed shipment? Did a sales rep forget to confirm an order?

When customers experience a “frictionless experience” with another company, they may say something to you, like, “Why aren’t you as easy as Amazon?” or, ‘When I had to return something to Nordstrom, that was really easy, and it’s really hard when I try to return something to you.” Recognize these comments as opportunities to improve and meet your customer’s expectations. Frictionless is something that often goes unnoticed. It means that everything is going so well that customers don’t need to contact the companies they are doing business with. For the business, it means the contact rate goes down, and the Net Promoter Score and customer loyalty go up. Look at the frequency of why customers contact you and figure out the challenges that frustrate them most and eliminate it from happening.